By: Lisa Patrick

Geoffrey Simmons, M.D., best known for his works in medicine and nonfiction, has taken a delightfully unexpected turn with his latest book, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Uranus: Formerly The Glue Factory. A riotous blend of Douglas Adams-style absurdity with the sharp social satire of Kurt Vonnegut, Simmons’ novel introduces readers to Dr. Alan Rossum, a plastic, ultra-humanlike robot physician navigating the bizarre and often perilous world of modern medicine.

This book is a rollercoaster of sci-fi humor, packed with invisible patients, extraterrestrial health crises, time-traveling medical cases, and a profound, underlying critique of our increasingly automated healthcare system. Kirkus Reviews has praised it as “raucous entertainment,” and it’s easy to see why—Simmons’ departure from his usual style has resulted in one of the most wildly original books of the year.

A Sci-Fi Comedy That’s More Reality Than Fiction

Dr. Alan Rossum is no ordinary doctor—he’s fireproof, germ-resistant, self-cleaning, and impeccably polite. He doesn’t need breaks, doesn’t get tired, and never calls in sick. He can perform everything from heart surgery to cosmetic enhancements with robotic precision. And yet, despite his perfection, some forces at work want to see him fail.

The novel plays with the idea that robotic doctors are not just science fiction but an inevitable future. Simmons points out that we already have robotic assistants in hospitals—machines delivering medications, AI handling mental health counseling, and even surgical robots like the DaVinci system aiding human physicians. But what happens when these robots surpass their creators? Can a flawless machine doctor ever truly replace a flawed but compassionate human physician?

The Inspirations Behind Dr. Rossum

Simmons’ creation of Dr. Rossum was heavily influenced by Rossum’s Universal Robots (R.U.R.), a 1920 play by Czech writer Karel Čapek, which first introduced the term “robot.” This homage is fitting, as Simmons envisions a future where AI and robotics dominate medicine, potentially revolutionizing or, perhaps, upending it.

“Robots practicing medicine will happen way after robots are selling shoes, giving tickets for jaywalking, handing out towels in restrooms, and secretly working as chefs at five-star restaurants,” Simmons jokes. The satire runs deep, but it also raises serious questions about the trajectory of medical technology.

The absurdist humor of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Uranus exaggerates these trends to hilarious extremes. Rossum isn’t just a doctor; he’s an Olympic-level athlete, a diagnostic powerhouse, and a dream employee for hospitals looking to cut costs. However, as the novel suggests, efficiency and perfection come at a price that may not be measured in dollars but in the loss of human touch.

Extraterrestrial Patients and Time-Traveling Chaos

One of the book’s many delights is its utterly unpredictable cast of patients. From invisible individuals to extraterrestrials with wildly different anatomies and cultural expectations, Rossum is constantly challenged in ways no human doctor could ever imagine.

“There’s much to learn from extraterrestrials, including dinner table manners and not talking back to your parents,” Simmons quips. “On Betelgeuse, a loudmouth kid might get one of his heads bitten off.” The novel’s humor is sharp, irreverent, and unapologetically weird, much like Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Simmons also touches on the ridiculous but intriguing notion of time-traveling patients. What happens when a patient from the future—or worse, the past—needs treatment? How do you diagnose an illness from a century that hasn’t happened yet? These conundrums provide fertile ground for some of the book’s most outlandish (and laugh-out-loud) moments.

The Satirical Edge: Medicine in the Age of AI

While the novel is, first and foremost, an absurd comedy, it also serves as a scathing satire of modern medicine. As hospitals increasingly prioritize cost-cutting and efficiency, the rise of AI in healthcare seems inevitable. Simmons imagines a world where robots dictate medical orders, supervise doctors, and punish those who fail to comply.

“The problem,” Simmons warns, “is that robots don’t know TLC from FU.” This statement ideally captures the novel’s core dilemma: will healthcare lose its human element as technology advances?

Simmons doesn’t offer answers, but his book raises thought-provoking questions in the most entertaining way possible. Would we trust a doctor who is never wrong but lacks empathy? Would hospitals prioritize AI physicians over human ones if it meant saving money? And, more importantly, do we want a future where the warm reassurance of a doctor’s touch is replaced by cold, clinical efficiency?

A Must-Read for Fans of Sci-Fi, Satire, and Smart Comedy

With The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Uranus, Geoffrey Simmons has crafted a book that is as clever as it is ridiculous, as insightful as it is absurd. Readers intrigued by the future of AI and medicine will enjoy the novel’s sharp, satirical edge, while those who appreciate offbeat humor will find plenty to love.

This is sci-fi comedy at its peak—hilarious, thought-provoking, and refreshingly original. Whether you’re here for the laughs, the social commentary, or just the sheer weirdness of it all, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Uranus is well worth taking.

Published by Iris S.